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Showing posts from April, 2020

That time when Jesse Ventura ran for governor (oh, and won)

I originally wrote this while features editor of the Heights at Boston College for my "Progressive Revelations" column on November 9, 1998.  And here we are in 2020 and there's actually a reason to let it resurface...
John Glenn didn’t stay in space for long, but I’m sure he wondered if he landed on the right planet when he discovered the results of Election Day.  In Minnesota’s biggest spotlight since the Twins were in the World Series, former wrestler Jesse “The Body” Ventura was elected the state’s new governor.  What’s on his agenda? Here’s a list of possible goals:
- Enclose the entire state in turnbuckles, and encase those turnbuckles within a cage.If a person leaves Minnesota, he or she will be sent back in after 10 seconds or otherwise be disqualified from state citizenship.If anyone wishes to enter Minnesota, that person can do so by simply climbing the cage, on the grounds that he or she will not bring in any chairs, mace or metal objects.However, if the state re…