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Showing posts from July, 2020

Theft with Consent

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(Originally published in July of 2003)

This column is long overdue.  To put it in library terms, which I guess I already did (but I'd like to elaborate), this column is like checking out a book in 1998 but not returning it until yesterday.  And by yesterday, I really mean tomorrow.  This analogy will only grow as time continues because yesterday and tomorrow are both relative terms.  I can't wait until the space creatures read this in the year 2577.  Maybe they will e-mail me when they do, just so I feel like my previous sentence came with a purpose.

As far as my purpose, I'd like to address the issue of valet parking this week because, quite frankly, I think it's the worst system in the world.  If I was still on that library kick, I'd add that Dewey Decimal -- if that <i>is</i> his real name -- would be laughing in his grave.  Now I understand that this is a "fancy" way to park because someone is doing the parking for you, and anytime someo…

The Five Rules of Facebook -- Still!

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On July 28, 2009, I wrote about the five rules of Facebook.  A lot has changed since then.  For example, we only wore masks on Halloween or to try on Halloween costumes in 2009. Still, I don't think much has truly changed in regards to Facebook.  Here's the original column:

Life has a lot of rules, which is good because they give rulers something to do besides measure things. In the summer, people follow such important rules as "No running around the pool," "No swimming in the ocean without a lifeguard" and "No accepting candy from a stranger unless the stranger says the candy is good."  I've been noticing, however, that there are a lot of rules people should be following when it comes to Facebook, the social networking site that helps its users to connect with the people that sat behind them in math class (it's about time, huh?).  Although there are probably hundreds of rules that Facebook users should follow, I have come up with just fiv…